I'll be honest, I can be judgmental.
I never really noticed much before. That is, until I became a mother. And the reason I've noticed my tendancy to judge is because I'm doing a LOT LESS of it now.
As a side note - isn't it funny how you can be sailing along in life thinking, "Hey, I'm doing pretty good! Read my Bible this morning, said a quick prayer, been goin' to church regularly, etc, etc.." then BAM!! it hits you! A sin is uncovered that you didn't even realize was there! I love that God does that. He doesn't hit you with all of your sins at once. I'm pretty sure I'd be crushed under the weight of that. Anyhoo...
It's easy, though, isn't it? To judge? It is for me. Especially when I only see a few details of a person's life and maybe catch them on a bad day.
Like, when you're at the grocery store and you see the mom who's child has food all over her face and dirt under her fingernails. I used to think I would never go out in public with my child like that.
You know what? That's exactly how my 2yr old looked today as we waltzed into Target. You know what else? Neither of us cared. :) We had things to do (and baby sister was upset) and I did not have the time or the desire to make sure every little crumb was off of her face. I'm pretty sure she'll still grow up to be a well-adjusted adult. Unless, of course, I damage her in other ways..
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" Matthew 7:3
Yup, since becoming a mother (especially since becoming a mother of two) I've decided that pretty much anything goes.
Instead of thinking, "I would never bribe my children with food just to keep them quiet in the store."
Now it goes something like this, "You need some snacks for your child? Hold on! I've got pretzels, raisins, crackers.. whaddya need?"
Instead of thinking, "I wouldn't leave my house with my child's face looking like that."
Well, you know that story..
Since becoming a mom, I'm finding that being quick to judge just doesn't work for me anymore. Don't get me wrong, I haven't "arrived" or anything - I have a long way to go. But, thank the Lord, I'm not where I used to be!
“Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37
Lord, help me to realize and know that every mom is doing the best she can, myself included. Please help me to have an open heart and mind and to love as You love. Amen
I just did a similarly themed post. God must be trying to tell us something. :O)
ReplyDeleteGREAT post!!! I have a way to go in this area...however, I think once you have more than 1 child like you mentioned it does get a bit easier! I'm a lot more laid back now. I think a big thing for me is that I don't want to pass a superior attitude down to my children or that how we look is the most important thing in life, kwim? I usually feel REALLY sorry for the moms that have a screaming child in a store knowing that I've BTDT!!! Sometimes I do feel a little disgusted if I think it's more of a lack of care then just not getting to it...but I need to be careful about that too...maybe the mom has to work and is never home or they don't have the money for newer clothing or their washing machine is broke...so on...I AM so quick to judge. Thank the Lord for my children to make me more laid back!!! :) See He is using these little urchins to show us stuff about ourselves and grow us! :D Thanks for this post! I'm going to pray about this more! :)
ReplyDeleteLove ya!
Have you seen the movie Babies? It was really fascinating. Those four babies were growing up in vastly different cultures, each with different access to "stuff." The baby with the least "stuff" was just as happy and healthy---if not more so---than the baby with the most "stuff." Helped me realize that, no matter how different our parenting styles and environment, as long as a child is loved he or she will turn out just fine!
ReplyDeleteI followed you from The Lazy Christian.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed your blog.
I just read a great article by Thomas S. Monson today about us judging. It got my attention in a humbling way.
I wrote a blog about Preconceived Notion on March 27 about how I was 'never' going to be 'that' kind of mom. Well, 5 (grown)children later I have surpassed my expectations (in a reverse sort of way!)
Thank you for your words.
They are inspiring and touching at the same time!
theunexpectedlife2010.blogspot.com
Yes, parenting is the ultimate antidote to judgmentalness! It is the most humbling experience ever. I've been on the other end of other's judgmentalness and that feels awful, especially when you know they don't understand the full picture. The older I get, the more willing I am to give others, especially moms, the benefit of the doubt -- and grace.
ReplyDelete